Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Let it snow, let it snow!!!
They say winter time makes some people feel gloomy, moody and just unwell. I would say it must be the cold weather but definitely not the snow fall.
I wake up in the morning and it's still dark even if it's already 8am....
not enough time to cook heavy breakfast since sleeping was a better option...
wearing layers and layers of clothes to get ready for the battle of cold outside the house....
walk towards the office and almost being blown by the wind.....
Yeah these is the usual day for me and it makes you sometimes feel so sad that you actually have to get up rather than stay in bed until it gets warm(which means noon time?). Match it with a week that my laptop crashed just when I thought of backing up my files the first time(lost some of my data but at least not the relevant photos).
Then it started snowing......
The mood changed...
the feeling of sadness gone...
it was no longer a gray clouds but white particles falling from above...
It's not yet snowing everyday though, but at least it gives me that incentive of looking forward to the sight of the snow... I am still in awe when I see snow falling given the fact that it's not really my first time to see snow. Yet on a Monday morning at 745am when everyone is supposed to travel to The Hague to apply for a Romanian visa, I thought I would feel worse than my daily routine which I just start debating with my alarm if I should get up already or not. This Monday morning was different though coz despite having to get out at 730am to meet the rest of the people, during the train ride I enjoyed the view of the snow falling along the road as well as the scenery of everything covered with snow.... fields, roofs, cars, etc. It was just a magnificent view and even a great feeling of having to walk through those icy sidewalks for 10 minutes to get to the embassy. Had it just been an ordinary day, then the roads and sidewalks would be meaningless and seem like an obligation to be up at that time.
Those small moments when it starts snowing gives me a smile that kids would usually have.... and it does mean a lot to me... I wish it would happen much more often, for with or without snow, it's cold anyway.... so I think I'd rather have that view and play around some more snow!!!
Friday, January 21, 2005
Blown by the wind
for the latest thoughts such as below: please refer to http://liv.nomadlife.org
It's a very silent night,
with no one else but me.
I hear nothing but the cold rush of the wind,
Roaring, thumbling, fighting against the trees.
The sounds of the wind come and go,
simply knocking through my windows
It's keeping me company in my deepest thoughts
what will the future hold for me tomorrow.
If only winds can talk,
then maybe being blown by the wind in that direction does mean something.
Then again, the rain keeps us company
so there's nothing more but a gloomy night of sorrow.
It's a very silent night,
with no one else but me.
I hear nothing but the cold rush of the wind,
Roaring, thumbling, fighting against the trees.
The sounds of the wind come and go,
simply knocking through my windows
It's keeping me company in my deepest thoughts
what will the future hold for me tomorrow.
If only winds can talk,
then maybe being blown by the wind in that direction does mean something.
Then again, the rain keeps us company
so there's nothing more but a gloomy night of sorrow.
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
Snowing in Netherlands
The big windows in our office, allow us to enjoy the view of the finest weathers in the city. During summer time, the sun used to play hide and seek with us such that it would give us such great pleasure during the day then hides away from the rain after 6pm when our work is finished and we have to walk all the way home.
This morning seem to be quite a gloomy day waking up at 8am thinking that it was just 6am. The show must go on as they say, this does not stop us from going to work. The cold weather may sometimes feel you lazy or just cozy as well... but with snow falling in the mid day it was just an amazing view at least for someone like me who don't get to see snow fall everyday. Ofcourse the experts would say "it's not snow not until you can make a snowball out of it", but for me it was still an amazing view. This time I started to appreciate such big windows without regretting that I am actually inside the office while seeing this view... for definitely I cannot bear much colder weather outside and all the more with snow and winds. A great blessing from above, made this day so productive with great contentment of life.
This morning seem to be quite a gloomy day waking up at 8am thinking that it was just 6am. The show must go on as they say, this does not stop us from going to work. The cold weather may sometimes feel you lazy or just cozy as well... but with snow falling in the mid day it was just an amazing view at least for someone like me who don't get to see snow fall everyday. Ofcourse the experts would say "it's not snow not until you can make a snowball out of it", but for me it was still an amazing view. This time I started to appreciate such big windows without regretting that I am actually inside the office while seeing this view... for definitely I cannot bear much colder weather outside and all the more with snow and winds. A great blessing from above, made this day so productive with great contentment of life.
Monday, January 17, 2005
A glimpse of Austria
"So you've been to Austria, how was Vienna?"
Yeah, Austria seem like a small country in the map, which is just near Germany, Switzerland, Italy, Hungary, & Czech Republic just close to it. But there are indeed nice places other than Vienna. Arriving at 10pm from a 1.5 hour flight to Amsterdam arriving in Vienna, it would be unfair of course to not see the city at least. So we drove around the city and walked through the center, saw some churches and architectures... they remain in my memory as I was just enjoying the walk I forgot to take some photos.
The rest of the 3 days was spent at Upper Austria, visiting towns such as Steyr and Leonstein and indeed just enjoying the view of the snowy mountains and hills, late afternoon walks around the city which lasted for a few hours before relaxing Austrian dinners.
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
The Road to be taken
After 2 days of being back at work, we had to leave about 3 hours away from Netherlands to be with the whole 18 people AI team once again and kick off the second half of our year. It doesn’t go directly with work of course, so we had the opportunity to go to Maastricht and have this teambuilding exercise around a cave. Divided into groups of 4-5, we had to find our way out of our cave, with directions
given to us and just 2 flash lights.
“Turn left when you see the t-junction; go up to an elevated level(meaning go up the stairs); don’t walk towards the direction where there’s no light”
given to us and just 2 flash lights.
“Turn left when you see the t-junction; go up to an elevated level(meaning go up the stairs); don’t walk towards the direction where there’s no light”
These were just examples of how we had to go around and find our way out of the cave. It may sound easy to follow directions with just turning left or right, up or down, but it was confusing as to how you identify what a t-junction mean or what does it mean to be in an elevated area. Not to mention that we had to answer several riddles or questions as well as part of the quest of the way out of the cave.
It definitely was a great way to bond the team once again, knowing who was scared most of the dark or who just scares people away. But what struck me the most was the whole experience seemed to have depicted how life’s choices can indeed be complicated. When I am trying to think which road to take-it’s not just two roads diverged on a yellow wood, because after each road is another set of choices you have to make and indeed be put in that test once again.
While trying to get out of the maze, we even had to go back and forth and walk the same route once again just to realize that it’s not the right path we’ve taken… and it’s at that point where we’ve lost track of what direction were we not able to follow. Yet, it didn’t stop us to walk back and forth just to see which road is the best way anyway. In the end, it was not the success of finding the way out of the cave that was the most exciting part but the means by which we were able to reach the end. Either we have to walk that very enclosed area, walk back and forth through a dead end or simply open doors that has skeletons in it… it was a successful journey indeed.
This year is indeed just part of the bigger journey I have taken, to where it will lead me I am not sure for one door can lead to another window of opportunities and endless doors to choose from. I may have some direction with me, but I am not afraid to get lost along the way for as long it would enable me to find the right path in the end. It’s not a matter of choosing what’s right and wrong but definitely choosing good, better and best in ensuring that the journey to success is fulfilling to my life as a whole. Just like the maze, it was the different riddles we had to solve along the way in finding the exit that made the 1.5 hours walk a great journey to take.
It definitely was a great way to bond the team once again, knowing who was scared most of the dark or who just scares people away. But what struck me the most was the whole experience seemed to have depicted how life’s choices can indeed be complicated. When I am trying to think which road to take-it’s not just two roads diverged on a yellow wood, because after each road is another set of choices you have to make and indeed be put in that test once again.
While trying to get out of the maze, we even had to go back and forth and walk the same route once again just to realize that it’s not the right path we’ve taken… and it’s at that point where we’ve lost track of what direction were we not able to follow. Yet, it didn’t stop us to walk back and forth just to see which road is the best way anyway. In the end, it was not the success of finding the way out of the cave that was the most exciting part but the means by which we were able to reach the end. Either we have to walk that very enclosed area, walk back and forth through a dead end or simply open doors that has skeletons in it… it was a successful journey indeed.
This year is indeed just part of the bigger journey I have taken, to where it will lead me I am not sure for one door can lead to another window of opportunities and endless doors to choose from. I may have some direction with me, but I am not afraid to get lost along the way for as long it would enable me to find the right path in the end. It’s not a matter of choosing what’s right and wrong but definitely choosing good, better and best in ensuring that the journey to success is fulfilling to my life as a whole. Just like the maze, it was the different riddles we had to solve along the way in finding the exit that made the 1.5 hours walk a great journey to take.
2005: a new year, a new beginning, a new experience....
It may not have been a White Christmas, neither did Mr. Snowman show up on New Year's Eve. It was definitely a memorable one, even being away from Philippines.... but definitely not away from home. My second home, Netherlands, with the rest of my "family"-the AI family. We had a great New Year's dinner with 7 other people from 5 different countries, and with a great chef as Lele, who's actually started preparing the dinner 2 days beforehand, I don't think I could have asked for something more.
Ofcourse you can't start new year with some little tradition. In the Philippines, we would usually throw coins, wear polka dots shirt or have round fruits to symbolize luck in terms of money. Then my parents didn't forget to remind for me to jump for the hope of still growing up even just an inch taller. Last year with Lizzie, my Mexican friend, spending New Year with me along with other trainees, we had certain practices such as dancing around the wine then drinking it to symbolize prosperity. After which we had to run the farthest and fastest we could(imagine running outside our house in Baguio, which has temperature of 6-8 degrees) to symbolize how far you're gonna travel the coming year(and indeed it was worth the run even if after the wine as I am now here in Netherlands). This year, with a little Brazilian influence, we had to eat meat that doesn't go backwards... so no chicken nor turkey for us as we only had to eat food that goes forward.... so we had tuna, salmon, crabs, shrimps & mushrooms(in different dishes/recipe). Afterwhich, we had to eat 12 grapes and wish for each piece that we eat to symbolize the different months of the year. Then we had to refresh our faces with warm water that has rose petals on it. Unfortunately, I couldn't do my run this year as it was about -1 degrees at that night but still managed to jump up high(maybe my last chance before I turn 25).
What does it mean anyway to celebrate a new year? These traditions were definitely nice to celebrate with a group of people that you really enjoy time with. Regardless if these will indeed bring you luck or not, it definitely provides you with a great insight of the year ahead.
Ofcourse you can't start new year with some little tradition. In the Philippines, we would usually throw coins, wear polka dots shirt or have round fruits to symbolize luck in terms of money. Then my parents didn't forget to remind for me to jump for the hope of still growing up even just an inch taller. Last year with Lizzie, my Mexican friend, spending New Year with me along with other trainees, we had certain practices such as dancing around the wine then drinking it to symbolize prosperity. After which we had to run the farthest and fastest we could(imagine running outside our house in Baguio, which has temperature of 6-8 degrees) to symbolize how far you're gonna travel the coming year(and indeed it was worth the run even if after the wine as I am now here in Netherlands). This year, with a little Brazilian influence, we had to eat meat that doesn't go backwards... so no chicken nor turkey for us as we only had to eat food that goes forward.... so we had tuna, salmon, crabs, shrimps & mushrooms(in different dishes/recipe). Afterwhich, we had to eat 12 grapes and wish for each piece that we eat to symbolize the different months of the year. Then we had to refresh our faces with warm water that has rose petals on it. Unfortunately, I couldn't do my run this year as it was about -1 degrees at that night but still managed to jump up high(maybe my last chance before I turn 25).
What does it mean anyway to celebrate a new year? These traditions were definitely nice to celebrate with a group of people that you really enjoy time with. Regardless if these will indeed bring you luck or not, it definitely provides you with a great insight of the year ahead.
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
Life is a Roller Coaster ride
Chaos. Disturbing.Meaning. Direction.Reflection. Rationale.Life. Family.
These were just some of the words that has always been bugging me the past few days. Trying to write these words to something that would make more sense, but the definitions and images that comes to my mind when referring to these words stuck me when trying to make it more concrete.
After a week I’m finally awake, but no it was not a nightmare.
Post-Christmas, a strucking news awoke not only me but the rest of the world. Every days was getting worse, numbers multiplying as predicted as if these were just mere statistics than actual lives being lost.
Holidays is indeed a time to spend the most time with your family. I was away from home the first time, and felt really sad as if my own family was affected. Yes ofcourse, I am referring to a different family and that’s my AP family. In AIESEC, they refer to me as the AP Mama, or at least the one responsible for the operations in AIESEC AP. For me to see my babies being affected, places I’ve once visited either for a personal visit or a business meeting are suddenly depicted to be so much different situation that no one can imagine. Just as any mom would be so worried, it is a big relief to find out that at least my AIESEC family are safe. However, they too have families that they belong to, and those were the ones that were lost as families
in AP are more than just your mom & dad; brother and sister.
The next question posed now is what to do? As their mom, is there something I could actually do? Somehow I also feel powerless for everyday, the numbers just seem to be increasing and worse even to imagine the psychological effect it can give to the ones who survived. The bitter memories of the families left behind, the life saved but has lost the source of livelihood or just mere loss of meaning for living.
Just as I was trying to find meaning in my life as well over the first week of holidays, this has become a big realization for me. After such catastrophe I thought that it’s best indeed to live each minute with a dream, with some reason or meaning. Otherwise, it may just be slashed away even on the most solemn moments of our lives and it will be too late to reflect on it.
There are so many things that we are capable of doing that we’d think we haven’t achieved anything at all. In reality, we can really just achieve a fraction of our potential and our life expires. It’s just a matter of deciding how to maximize each of our potential and be satisfied with what we have.
I am but a 24 year old girl who may be nearing through the quarter life crisis of “analysis paralysis”- we tend to think and reflect the most than we have had our entire life. Yet to me, finding meaning to life right now may be too early to search for. It’s the process though of digging the best thoughts and meaning that makes life challenging.
I try to understand what it means for humanity for such catastrophe to happen. I try to find solutions or areas where I can contribute the most to help alleviate some things. Yet, I would say I am still powerless of providing such solutions to such catastrophes, as there are even worse off scenarios and situations that may not be even featured in the news than what we’ve seen right now. At the same time, I try to figure out that through what I am doing now, I could somehow disturb people and influence them not only to think through the same process I had but to provide some action, no matter how small is it.
Alone, I cannot do anything. You and me we can do something. Together we can provide meaning with each other’s lives.
Post-Christmas, a strucking news awoke not only me but the rest of the world. Every days was getting worse, numbers multiplying as predicted as if these were just mere statistics than actual lives being lost.
Holidays is indeed a time to spend the most time with your family. I was away from home the first time, and felt really sad as if my own family was affected. Yes ofcourse, I am referring to a different family and that’s my AP family. In AIESEC, they refer to me as the AP Mama, or at least the one responsible for the operations in AIESEC AP. For me to see my babies being affected, places I’ve once visited either for a personal visit or a business meeting are suddenly depicted to be so much different situation that no one can imagine. Just as any mom would be so worried, it is a big relief to find out that at least my AIESEC family are safe. However, they too have families that they belong to, and those were the ones that were lost as families
in AP are more than just your mom & dad; brother and sister.
The next question posed now is what to do? As their mom, is there something I could actually do? Somehow I also feel powerless for everyday, the numbers just seem to be increasing and worse even to imagine the psychological effect it can give to the ones who survived. The bitter memories of the families left behind, the life saved but has lost the source of livelihood or just mere loss of meaning for living.
Just as I was trying to find meaning in my life as well over the first week of holidays, this has become a big realization for me. After such catastrophe I thought that it’s best indeed to live each minute with a dream, with some reason or meaning. Otherwise, it may just be slashed away even on the most solemn moments of our lives and it will be too late to reflect on it.
There are so many things that we are capable of doing that we’d think we haven’t achieved anything at all. In reality, we can really just achieve a fraction of our potential and our life expires. It’s just a matter of deciding how to maximize each of our potential and be satisfied with what we have.
I am but a 24 year old girl who may be nearing through the quarter life crisis of “analysis paralysis”- we tend to think and reflect the most than we have had our entire life. Yet to me, finding meaning to life right now may be too early to search for. It’s the process though of digging the best thoughts and meaning that makes life challenging.
I try to understand what it means for humanity for such catastrophe to happen. I try to find solutions or areas where I can contribute the most to help alleviate some things. Yet, I would say I am still powerless of providing such solutions to such catastrophes, as there are even worse off scenarios and situations that may not be even featured in the news than what we’ve seen right now. At the same time, I try to figure out that through what I am doing now, I could somehow disturb people and influence them not only to think through the same process I had but to provide some action, no matter how small is it.
Alone, I cannot do anything. You and me we can do something. Together we can provide meaning with each other’s lives.
